May 5, 2011

Un-Love Connection

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My friend Erin was dating this guy. We'll call him Josh. Josh had a friend, well call him Scott, and even though Scott had a girlfriend, he apparently hated her and Josh thought it was a genius idea to set up Erin's single friend, me, with Scott so that he could then break up with the gf. Somehow I allowed this to happen. I think I was just bored that day.
The plan, as I understood it, was that we would all meet at Josh's house. I met Erin where she worked, at the end of her shift, and followed her to Josh's. Josh had errands to run so we all got is his truck to go on an adventure. Yes errands count as an adventure. I still thought that Scott was going to meet us at Josh's but apparently not. After done with the errands, we went to a truck stop to meet Scott. Josh owns a tractor-trailer-18-wheeler-thingy and Scott is his driver. So he would be driving over in the truck and the four of us would be then go back to Josh's to "hang out." It had also become fairly late evening. This means I would be meeting this guy in the dark, in the back of Josh's truck. Excellent plan. 

Eventually he shows up and hops in the truck. We're introduced, but I have no idea what to say to this guy I'm now sitting next to, and he's not bringing anything to the table either.
I decide that the best way to hand this situation was to start texting my friend Melissa. While trying to at least talk to Erin so there wasn't just awkward silence.
I also tell Melissa that, since she lives two minutes away from Josh's house, I would be staying with her that night, instead of making the 40 minute drive home. She said it was fine but wouldn't be back till late.

Back at Josh's we enter through the kitchen and Josh and Scott sit down at the kitchen table. So me and Erin are left to stand against the counter 15' away. 
Yeah, that's how we can all take part in the same conversation. I determine that Scott isn't really that good looking and oh, he smokes. No thank you. 

As Scott and Josh have one conversation and Erin and I have another, I've given up even trying to get to know him at all. Josh even left the room at some point and when Erin attempted to bring him into our conversaiton, he was too busy texting (probably his gf) to notice and to join in. 
At this point I'm just waiting for Melissa to get home so I can leave. Finally, Scott has to leave to drive the truck out to NY and he and Josh leave. 

Melissa still hasn't gotten home so I have to wait and Josh gets back and asks what I think. The nicest thing I could think to say was "it wasn't a love connection," (a line from The Office when Pam was set up on a blind date), and we were able to just chat until I could finally leave. 

I had the worst time falling asleep due to the anxiety the whole event caused me, which sucked because I had to get up all early due to Melissa having to go to work.  
Josh told Erin that Scott didn't think it was a good match either, (duh), but he was open to "talking." Meaning that he was up for a phone relationship, so that he could grow balls and break up with the gf. ... or something. Or he thought I was hot enough that he could hook up with me, even though he had no interest in dating me. I had come to my senses by now and firmly declined this "offer" and went on with my life, happy to not be a home wrecker.


  1. Yeah, he would hook up with you. But a smoker? Nah. No thanks.

  2. I find it really amusing that Josh has a driver for his 18-wheeler-thingy, and doubly amusing that your date commenced at a truck stop!! Sounds like a date I would have had!! ;)

  3. I was worried about where this story was headed, the set-up was a little messed up. I'm super glad you didn't allow yourself to be the lady on the side or spin-kicked any of the others involved, the latter of which I totally would have done.


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